Ellen DeGeneres: ‘Big Winner’ From Election Night Was ‘Alcohol’ [VIDEO]

Katie Jerkovich | Contributor

Ellen DeGeneres told her audience that the big winner from election night was “alcohol.”

On Thursday, the 58-year-old talk show host promised to bring joy to her audience after Donald Trump defeated Hillary Clinton for president. (RELATED: Ellen DeGeneres Defends Herself Against Critics Over ‘Racist’ Meme)


“You may have heard that there was a presidential election on Tuesday — the big winner was alcohol, a lot of alcohol,” DeGeneres said. “Obviously, a lot of people were disappointed by the results. My job is to be hopeful and to make everybody feel good. (RELATED: Ellen DeGeneres Sued Over ‘Titty’ Joke)

“And I’m gonna keep doing that for as long as I can,” she added. “I will do it because I love you — and because I have very expensive taste in automobiles. At times like this it is important to remember what Eleanor Roosevelt said, It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness.”

“I think that is a beautiful thing, and I believe you should also remember what Kanye West once said: ‘Blocka, blocka, blocka, blocka, pour a little champagne, cranberry vodka.'”

Caitlyn Jenner becomes a woman

(Photo: Ellen DeGeneres screen grab)

“So if you’re feeling a little anxious or scared, I’m here to tell you that things can still turn out to be OK,” she continued, before showing a BBC “Planet Earth II” clip of a baby iguana escaping a pit of snakes.

“I’m not gonna show you sad stuff. … He made it,” DeGeneres said. “That little baby iguana got away! And that’s what we’re gonna do. We’re all gonna do that. If you feel like there’s snakes coming at you from every direction — the snakes may be the fact that you don’t feel heard, or no one’s on your side, or that you don’t like what’s on the Starbucks Holiday Cups this year — no matter what your snake is, there is hope for your little iguana.”

Katie Jerkovich



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