Yesterday, I wrote about how Donald Trump should deploy Delta Force to defend the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show in China.
I feel that it’s incredibly important to defend our models at all costs. Here’s how I explained an extraction would go down:
Finally, the extradition plan is a simple one. An aircraft carrier will be kept off the coast of China, and a transport plane will be kept on around the clock standby at the Shanghai airport. If an evacuation is needed, the Delta Force operators will drive the motorcade to the airport, load onto the plane, get into international airspace and be escorted by fighter jets to a safe location.
It didn’t take long before I realized I might have accidentally written the coolest movie in the history of cinema. I bounced around the idea with some coworkers for a little bit, and it was soon settled that Matthew McConaughey would obviously have to play the head of the Delta Force team, Gerard Butler would likely be the villain and Armie Hammer should probably have some role.
I threw a question about this movie proposal to the Twitter world, and the reception was overwhelmingly positive.
Would you watch a movie where Matthew McConaughey has to protect the Victoria’s Secret Fashion show from a terrorist attack?
I lay out the main plot points here: https://t.co/Ps4LqewZlz
— David Hookstead (@dhookstead) November 14, 2017
Over 40% of people said they’d go see a movie where Matthew McConaughey had to protect a Victoria’s Secret fashion show that came under terrorist attack. Now, some of you might be saying that a 43 percent yes vote isn’t a lot. You’re simply displaying your ignorance when it comes to the film industry. There’s not a film studio in the world that’s not green lighting a movie if over 40 percent of people in America would go see it.
A movie with that much draw would put up “Star Wars” and “Harry Potter” box office numbers. It’d be so successful that it’d be disgusting.
Just imagine how many great McConaughey lines would be delivered in a movie where he has to kill bad guys in order to protect the hottest women on the planet. It’d be incredible. He walks into the dressing room, locks eyes with one of the smoke show and just casually says, “Alright, alright, alright.”
Then after all the terrorists are dead and he’s riding off into the sunset with a model, he just turns to the camera and says, “Just keep on living.”
This is straight entertainment gold. He’s smoking terrorists and hanging with models. Easiest winning formula for a movie ever written.
I’m a humble dude, and I hate to brag. However, I think props to me are very much in order for this situation. I did just invent a movie that would probably win 20 Oscars. No big deal. Just another casual day at the office.