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Man Sues Pabst Brewing Company For Low Quality Beer In Mind-Boggling Move

(Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

Jena Greene Reporter
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A Sacramento, CA man is suing the company that makes PBR because its beer isn’t good enough for him.

Brendan Peacock filed a class action lawsuit against Pabst Brewing Company this month, claiming one of their products misled him into thinking their beer would be high quality. He says Pabst’s Olympia Beer product, whose motto is “It’s the Water,” misleads consumers into thinking the beer is brewed with “artesian water in Tumwater, Washington.”

“It is unclear where the water is actually from,” Peacock’s suit says. He also complains that it’s likely the water was chlorinated and “contaminated by industrial solvents in the past.”

This isn’t Peacock’s first lawsuit either. According to the Sacramento Bee, he sued the 21st Amendment Brewery Cafe in 2017 and a guacamole company before that. Both suits also claimed the companies were falsely advertising their ingredients.

Peacock also claims he paid a “premium price” for a pack of Olympia, which I think we all know is absolute bologna. A Seattle-based food lawyer says a six-pack of Olympia retails on the west coast for about $4. Not exactly a premium price.

This guy sounds like one of the worst humans on the planet. A lot of people probably think he’s a millennial, since he’s overly concerned about craft beers and guacamole and apparently can’t cope with the realities of grocery store marketing tactics. But this person is 37 years old. He’s a grown man. And he sues beer and guacamole companies for fun.

Two things are possible here with Brendan Peacock – if that even is his real name. Either he’s the biggest party novice in the world (entirely possible) and he doesn’t know that Pabst pretty much exclusively makes the worst quality beer on the planet, or he’s fully aware of the situation and is just trying to sniff out the loopholes and ruin everybody’s fun.

Either way, this guy deserves to lose this lawsuit and never drink a beer again. And I don’t take those words lightly. But some people are walking party fouls and Brendan Peacock seems to be the living, breathing incarnation of a buzzkill. We let it slide when you went for the guacamole. But you took it way too far going after Pabst, which is one of the biggest symbols of American pride. If Brendan Peacock thinks he’s took good for $4 beer, he should be locked up for a few months and forced to drink chlorinated water like the rest of us plebes.

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Jena Greene